13/11/2014

The Thinker's Advantage

Men are often startled when, without any warning, their dearly beloved suddenly asks “What are you thinking about right now?”

Naturally, the last thing a man should give is a truthful answer. Endless trouble will ensue if the man innocently replies: “Having sex with your best friend”. Therefore, in the unaccustomed role of agony uncle, I would suggest that men prepare a response in advance, and trot it out when required.
Good advice. Although, in honesty, I can remember only one time when I was the recipient of that clichéd question. To which I answered, thruthfully, "I was thinking, 'Should I ever get rich, it would be nice to have a separate room to put a pool table in'". That taught her, I guess.

What happens to me more often is that people think I'm looking at something specific, when actually I'm just staring into undefined space, usually reflecting on what was just said. (I'm not particularly quick.) With some delight I've noticed that a colleague of mine has memorized this as a characteristic of mine after I'd repeatedly explained to her that, no I wasn't looking at her shoes, I was just thinking, and my eyeballs have to point somewhere. I know she's memorized this as she recently started saying something about how I was probably hungry, the way I was looking at her meal, oh, no, wait, I was probably just thinking, right? That'll come in handy the next time she starts thinking I'm staring at her tits, when I'm actually, you know, staring at her tits. They're lovely, and I can't help it.

1 comment:

Mark Graybill said...

Discussions like this remind me how great my wife is. If she asks me what I'm thinking, I tell her frankly without hesitation and she's totally fine with it. I love my wife! <3